October 30, 2013 – Progression

October 30, 2013

The toilet finally came out of the garage and is back in the master bathroom, since last week. The shower doors are still in the garage, as is the bathroom door. Our contractor had to take a sabbatical for a few weeks for personal reasons, but he’s back on the job now, thank goodness. They had to pop out a few cracked tiles and put them back in the shower, today to regrout & tomorrow to seal. Hopefully by Friday, we might have the shower doors in, but I’m not holding my breath. Still, things are getting done, and that’s lovely. Perspective is everything.

I haven’t gotten to the other side of grief yet. I may not cry for days, and then I cry almost every day. Sometimes it’s merely a heart twinge. I talk to her all the time and I feel her with me. I know she doesn’t want me to be sad, and sometimes that’s the way it is. On the whole, it’s okay. I feel as if I’m more than hanging in there most of the time now.

I love being at the kid’s (and my) school. It has such a wonderful heartbeat. I enjoy working with the staff and being part of such a great team. I love working with the students and introducing them to Rudyard Kipling’s Just So Stories and other works. I am missing most of the book fair this week, but I need to be here, at home, with the contractors working on the house.

We were wandering around 6 Flags a few weeks back, using up tickets we had bought a few months earlier which were about to expire. My daughter was feeling tired, when she perked up and told me Gigi (her name for my mom) was sending her hearts carved into the pavement we were walking on.

Sometimes I feel there are two sides, similar to the movie the Matrix. The flesh and blood of working and playing, learning our lessons at our school of life — and the other side, where Mom is, helping behind the scenes, guiding us, giving us inspiration, helping us to find our path.